I Juggle and Play the Harp

So I've told you all how quiet life is here. Not much interaction with the fellas, that's for sure. I really don't know where that "100 men for every woman" thing came from because I'm here to tell you, it's just not true. Maybe it's because I work in the schools and hang out in the kind of places that attract 60 year olds who look like ZZ Top, but I'm not detecting any eligible bachelors in the area.
So, I decided to join one of those on-line dating sites. I've been alternately recommending that friends join them and then making endless fun of them when they do for quite awhile now. When my friend joined Match a few months ago, I sang "Everlasting Love" every time I saw her. I texted, e-mailed, voicemailed and Facebooked her the lyrics everyday for weeks. Now I'm just another looser justifing endless, meaningless emails from strangers.
My favorite so far is a toss up between the guy who plays the harp, likes to juggle and watch anime and the 54 year old who IMed me to ask if I'd Skype with him. Or maybe the guy from India who wanted me to call him so we could talk about a marriage arrangment. If I agreed to stay home and serve him.
No. No thank you.
The sad part is that as a 30 year old, my options are getting slimmer and slimmer. My preferance for no marriages, no kids will soon be impossible to find. Let's not even talk about the height requirement. At least my affinity for Carhart works in my favor up here. If I could find anyone under 40 wearing it.